The Domino Affect

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN

Smile...
Hello. September 23. That is what I looked like on that day. I have since gotten my hair cut and my hair is more, flat. So today, I look a little different. My eyes are not so, dark. And my neck! That's, my neck! Nice job lady at the Fall Fest. And that over there, is my smile. (For you Tom MacDonald, Nova Leigh, and Unkle Kracker too).
And those, are my glasses.
Btw. I found something today. Good, bad, happy, sad and, glad. My nerves were there too, but that is just Amy. Nothing new. What is new, is what she began to do. She began to open up, and be strong. Everyone seems to be more at ease, lol. Amy anyway. At this moment, she needs to get up and get dressed. But first, she must go in and get her shoes out of the washer. A good day, to dry in the sun. (A good day to do something, in the sun.)  Because today was an absolute bore. It is Sunday, and Amy needs, to plan for the week. Mixed in between Jason's appointments, Amy's appointments, and needing to go back to Kentucky to get Mike's things. By the way, my butt still hurts. I wish it would go away. Better yet...
I wish I had a butt. Cushion is needed. The boys need to find someplace else, to put their shoes. That won't happen. Amy just needs to pay more attention. Maybe. BTW. Three shootings today. Typical.
She's tired.
Typical.
Ugh.
Today, I miss Jason. Well, this morning I missed, Jason. He will be home from work soon to leave to go to his appointment. Do I want to go, with? Yes, and no. It's going to be another busy week with stuff.Which makes for a, frustrating week.
Because...
That is the way it goes. She is also feeling a little sad today. And she feels worn down. A different, kind of worn down.
Hmm??
I was tired of the same feeling, so I let it go. For now.
Lost...
Forward with what I know. But I have some things to do, first. Things like get the wall ready for winter. Maybe. It will be a clear night for the stars. I hope they are shining bright, for I am going to look, tonight. Oh, the feeders. They are full of birds! A few, cardinals. And only one, crow. He is playing nice so its ok for the moment. Perch-perch, perch away. Lol. Tweet-tweet. Even if she wanted to go inside, she wouldn't. Too much, stuff. And, people. It was a full moon when Jason awoke, and she asked him if he saw him too And, yes. He says he saw him too. Half asleep, even. And then he went into the living room to rest until he showers for work.
Amy needs to sleep, but she needs to be ready for what tomorrow holds. Any answers?
Lol.
She had a hip and pelvis x-ray, a referral to a different doctor, and a script for some odd weeks of physical therapy. On a good note, it is right up the street. She can drive herself. Later. It's dusk time and she is watching the ducks in the pool under the dam.
Thinking about why she has received no answers for what she is looking for. What happened?
I can't find the starting point. Where it, began. I know where it all began, but this is something different. Something way. different.
Something started to begin, again.

 

Amy loves games almost as much as she loves music. This is a book of games that has music ringing in her ears.
Bam!
Bam-bam.
Boom...
Board games. Card games. Oh, puzzles too. Games of chance. Mind games. Head games...
She's played one game for over a decade, all while listening to music. This has spread out over thirty-three years, which then turns into...nineteen more years. Maybe even more. Who knows?
She doesn't know. She has never known.
Why?
Well, that's because she's lost. Lost... Always.
The games follow her. Surround her. They're everywhere. Games she played yesterday, today, and games she's ready to play tomorrow. Each with a lesson. One she never thought she would have to learn...until the whole family packed up one day and moved.
From that moment, everything changed, because this move, out of all her other moves, is the one that made her someone she doesn't quite remember.
Truthfully, she can't remember much. That's why she writes it down. To remember things. Not everything. She does not want to remember all of it. LOL. There are things that she would like to forget.
It's a never-ending issue.
Issue. Nope. Plural (s). Issues.
All...over the places.
For the past twenty-four years, she has raised a family of three boys and a bunch of cats and dogs in between. But this isn't about that completely.
She has been put under a microscope by the US government. And she hasn't had a real voice since forever ago.
Hmmm...
5 + 1 + 2 + 1 + 3 + 3 + 2 + 1 + 4 + 2 + 2
Anyway, this saga of a story will make you giggle, make you laugh out loud, and maybe make you sad. Maybe not. But she wants somebody to feel what she feels, because that way, she'll know that she's not crazy.
What she is...she is happy, sad, mad, glad. Mainly mad. At everyone. Even her mom. That is why she wrote a story of happiness and pain. Frustration and anger. Joy and sorrow. Full of ups and downs, both good and bad. Madness and gladness. And every emotion she has never felt the right way. Or the left way.
This book is full of self-discovery and her own personal issues, because she wakes up lost. Lost... Every day. Including yesterday, tomorrow, and at some point, today.
Oh, boy. This is the start of everything. Again.
Now sit down.
Buckle up.
And enjoy the ride.

-- M.E. Austin